An old woman goes to the doctor's office. The doctor gives her a checkup and says, "I need to do stool, blood and urine tests." The woman says, "Well can I just leave my underwear? Bingo starts in half an hour."
Yo' Mama is so fat, she brought on world hunger.
Q: What can popsicles do that men can't? A: Come in five flavors.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she has to sneak up to water fountains to get a drink.
A man walks into a bar with his dog and orders two glasses of whiskey. He proposes a toast and both he and his dog empty their glasses. The girl behind the bar is surprised and asks: 'Can your dog perform other tricks?'. 'But of course', the man answers, 'he can even gratify a woman'. Anxious to know more the girl leads the man and the dog into a little room above the bar. She undresses and full of expectation she lies down on the bed. The dog looks at her and does nothing, and the man then shouts to the dog, 'OK. Just ONE more time, let me show you how it's done".
Chuck Norris' Motto is: "The beard is mightier than the sword."
Everyone knows Chuck Norris' pet rock... he named it "Earth."
Chuck Norris walks up his staircase to get to the basement.
Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a hippo? A: One has a big mouth and a fat ass. The other lives in rivers in tropical countries.
Only if they had more mosquito nets in Africa. We would be able to save millions of mosquitos from dying horribly from HIV.