Every bone inside Chuck Norris is his funny bone, cause he laughs wherever you hit him.
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris went to the sun and spent two nights.
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Chuck Norris' blood is the only blood to test positive for kickass.
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Chuck Norris can hear his phone ring on silent.
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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
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Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
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The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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