Q: How can you tell that a blonde been baking chocolate chip cookies?
A: There are M&M shells all over the floor.
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
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Guns can kill, Chuck Norris does!
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Chuck Norris once went logging and took down a forest.
Then he came back for his axe.
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Q: Why are crippled people always picked on?
A: Because they can't stand up for themselves.
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Yo mama so stupid, she dropped off her phone because it stopped.
Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
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Yo mamma so black when she gets in the car the oil light turns on.
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KFC in Asia?
Korean fried cat.
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