It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Chuck Norris once cried just to see what it was like. The end result was the creation of life.
Chuck Norris once broke the law... with his fists.
Transformers are just another name for Chuck Norris' grade 5 science project.
Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
Chuck Norris doesn't get shark attacked, the shark gets Chuck Norris attacked.
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
Wet doesn't get Chuck Norris Chuck Norris gets wet.
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.