Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: On average or do you want the whole distribution?
Europe to Iceland:
Why did you send us volcanic ash? Our airspace has shut down.
Iceland: What? That's what you asked for isn't it?
Europe: NO! We said cash! CASH!
Iceland: Woooops...
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Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
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Chuck Norris can kiss his own elbow, both at the same time.
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Susie was having her monthly bleeding and she asked little johnny for his advice!!
Little johnny Said Well i think i figured out ur problem!!!!
SOME RIPPED OFF YOUR BALLS
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A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon.
Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!"
The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would
there be any "we" in the first place."
Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
Much controversy surrounds Area 51, which is also known as Chuck Norris's playground.
Those flying saucers are similar to our model cars and planes.
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Apple, Microsoft and Sony, among others, strive to invent the most cool device to please Chuck Norris, the fail all the time.
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Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.