How did the Vikings send secret messages?
By norse code!
Why did the knight run about shouting for a tin opneder?
He had a bee in his suit of armour!
Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?
Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss!
Why were the early days of history called the dark ages?
Because there were so many knights!
‘I’m a bad lover.
Once I caught a peeping Tom booing me.’
Rodney Dangerfield
Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
Vote:
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Vote:
Q: How do you make a dog go ‘miaow’?
A: Freeze it in liquid nitrogen, and run it through a bandsaw…
Vote:
Chuck Norris can finish Sims.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
Vote:
A woman went shopping.
She walks to checkout counter and then the salesman packs all her groceries: milk, cheese, orange juice, half of bread, bar of soap, toothpaste...
All of a sudden the salesman asks her:
"You're single, aren't you?"
A bit surprised woman smiles and answers:
"That's right, but how did you guessed that?"
"Because you're so ugly."
In the beginning, God created light because Chuck allowed him to.
Vote:
Your moma is so ugly...she could make medicine sick!