How did the Vikings send secret messages?
By norse code!
Why did the knight run about shouting for a tin opneder?
He had a bee in his suit of armour!
Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?
Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss!
Why were the early days of history called the dark ages?
Because there were so many knights!
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A little boy was learning about God in his church, and he was talking to his mother about it.
She, not wanting to place prejudice in the little boy’s mind, sat him and said: “God is not a man or a woman, and God is not black or white.”
To which the child responded, “Well, then is God Michael Jackson?”
Q: Why did the cat sleep with a fan on?
A: He wanted to be a cool cat.
Yo Mama so old...
When she was at school...there was No history class!
Q: How are rape and an airplane similar?
A: The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
He used to be a bottle baby, but when he reached the age of ten he pushed the cork out and escaped.
The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college president, "you already make more than the entire History department."
"Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered.
"Look."
He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway.
"Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered.
Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath.
"You're not there, sir," he reported.
"Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the president, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."
Police Officer says "We'll never forget 9/11..."
In my mind: "I hope not It's your damn number!"
Q: What was the world's first palindrome?
A: Madam, I'm Adam.
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To finally solve whether Mona-Lisa is smiling or not, Chuck Norris took a quick look at it.
She's crying
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