Best jokes ever

"Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor-blade." "Don't panic, I'm coming immediately. Have you done anything yet?" "Yea, I shaved with the electric razor."
Vote: has 44.84 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, life
Why did the woman cross the road? That's not the point,what's she doing out of the kitchen?
Vote: has 44.74 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Well, you know what they say: unlucky in love, get the clap.
Vote: has 44.67 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
Vote: has 44.64 % from 80 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, sex, women
It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: “Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing. ” Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: “Will the nine hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class.”
Vote: has 44.61 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, school, student, weather
Anal sex is like your first car - you dont really want it, but your dad gave it to you anyways.
Vote: has 44.61 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Why don't sharks eat niggers? They think it's whale shit.
Vote: has 44.60 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, black people
‘I’m a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping Tom booing me.’ Rodney Dangerfield
Vote: has 44.56 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A nigger was walking naked on the beach at the nudists. He’s got tattooed on his dick his wife’s name WENDY. Suddenly he sees a white guy with something written on his dick and asks him: You have written your wife name too? No, I’m responsible for the tourists. So when my dick is on erection it reads:”WELCOME TO MIAMI BEACH. HAVE A NICE DAY!”
Vote: has 44.53 % from 184 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people
Q:What do you get if you add two apples and three apples? A:A high school math problem!
Vote: has 44.53 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math