The best animal jokes

Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy? Oh no, not snake and pygmy pie again!
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, marriage, wife
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, Chuck Norris
Late one night a couple is driving down a country highway and run over an oppossum. Knowing that mother oppossums often carry babies in their pouch, they decide to check out this poor animal. Sure enough there was a baby, so they decide to rescue it. They take it into the car and continue down the road. The little oppossum is scared and squirming around like crazy so the wife asks her husband what she should do? He thinks for a minute and says, " Well it's used to being in it's mother's pouch. Maybe if you unbutton your jeans, and put it in "there" it will calm down." She exclaims, " I'm not going to do that! That thing is smelly and nasty!" The husband replies," Well, why don't you just hold it's little nose!"
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns? A bull pull.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, war
How to you know that cows will be in heaven? It's a place of udder delight.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, heaven
Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
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has 37.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, kids
What do ducks wear to party's? A duck-sedo!
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has 37.27 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, duck, party
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