I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman…
“Mr Cook?”
“Yes,” I replied.
“I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.”
I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
It was a hot summer night.
Slowly I spread her legs and my hand was trying to find its way to her nipple...
I was so excited! I never milked a cow before...
Why couldnt the teddy bear eat any more thanksgiving dinner?
He was already stuffed!
Vote:
Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
What is a Zebra?
A Z-bra is 25 sizes bigger than an A-bra.
What's three meters high and jumps every ten seconds?
A dinosaur with the hiccups.
Why does the chicken is sad?
Because his dad is a cock.
Why does the chicken is even more sad?
Because he faces the same future.
Q: What do you call a fight between you and your dad?
A: Dady issues!
Why do police dogs lick their balls?
To get the taste of Nigger out their mouths.
Q: What was the last thing her husband said to her?
A: I'll feed the dog, you feed the fish.