The best animal jokes

Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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has 38.12 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, duck
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
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has 38.00 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, fart, women
Q: What was the last thing her husband said to her? A: I'll feed the dog, you feed the fish.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, dog, fish, husband
Q. Why did the man cross the road? A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, men
Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
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has 37.68 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography
What do you call a man with a rabbit up his jumper? Warren.
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has 37.68 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal
When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, Chuck Norris
What do you call a frog with no legs? It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
Late one night a couple is driving down a country highway and run over an oppossum. Knowing that mother oppossums often carry babies in their pouch, they decide to check out this poor animal. Sure enough there was a baby, so they decide to rescue it. They take it into the car and continue down the road. The little oppossum is scared and squirming around like crazy so the wife asks her husband what she should do? He thinks for a minute and says, " Well it's used to being in it's mother's pouch. Maybe if you unbutton your jeans, and put it in "there" it will calm down." She exclaims, " I'm not going to do that! That thing is smelly and nasty!" The husband replies," Well, why don't you just hold it's little nose!"
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
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