The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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What do you get from a cow on the North Pole?
Cold cream.
In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
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How do you f*ck a fat chick?
Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
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What do you call a dinosaur that's a noisy sleeper?
A Brontosnorus.
A salesman is talking to a farmer when he looks over and sees a rooster wearing pants, a shirt, and suspenders.
He says, “What the hell is that all about?”
The farmer says, “We had a fire in the chicken coop and all his feathers got singed off, so the wife made him some clothes to keep him warm. There ain’t nothing funnier than watching him try to hold down a hen with one foot and get his pants down with the other.”
Q:Why do dogs stick their noses in women's crotches?
A:Because they can.
What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house?
The Lizard of Oz.
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving?
They couldn't get the moose in the oven!
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Why are rabbits like calculators?
They both multiply a lot.
The snake was punished because Chuck Norris tempted it to ate the apple.
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