"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm." "Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?" "I d look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"
A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."
Psychiatrist: "What’s your problem?" Patient: "I think I’m a chicken." Psychiatrist: "How long has this been going on?" Patient: "Ever since I was an egg!"
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
Why did Bossy tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone? She thought children should be seen and not herded!
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with strawberry soda? A berry bubbly bunny.
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny.
On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
What's a teddy bears favourite pasta? Tagliateddy.