The best animal jokes

What does the fox say? Whatever the hell Chuck Norris tells him to.
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown. She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep. She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?" The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?" "Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car. The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"
Vote: has 66.93 % from 85 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, blonde, dog, math, money
"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm." "Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?" "I d look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"
Vote: has 66.77 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, car
A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, god, parrot, technology
Sharks are not living on the sea because they can't breath on continent. They live on a sea, because Chuck Norris doesn't.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Psychiatrist: "What’s your problem?" Patient: "I think I’m a chicken." Psychiatrist: "How long has this been going on?" Patient: "Ever since I was an egg!"
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, doctor
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Why did Bossy tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone?  She thought children should be seen and not herded!
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
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More jokes about: animal, money, wedding
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with strawberry soda? A berry bubbly bunny.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, food


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