The best animal jokes

Gay translation I want a commitment. I'm sick of masturbation. Haven't I seen you before? Nice ass. I need you. My hand is tired. You're the only man I've ever cared about. You are the only man who hasn't rejected me. I'm a Romantic. I'm poor. I really want to get to know you better. So I can tell my friends about it. It's just orange juice, try it. 3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head. He's kinda cute. I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue! He's not my type. He won't sleep with me. I miss you so much I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good. I had a wonderful time last night. Who the hell are you? Do you love me? I've done something stupid and you might find out. Do you 'really' love me? I've done something stupid and you're going to find out. I'll give you a call. I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again. I've been thinking a lot. You're not as attractive as when I was drunk. I think we should just be friends. You're ugly. I've learned a lot from you. Next!!!!
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has 55.17 % from 233 votes. More jokes about: animal, gay, love, masturbation, ugly
Q: What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A: After a year the dog is still happy to see you.
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has 55.13 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, husband, marriage
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Where does a cow stop to drink? The milky way.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do cows do when they re introduced? They give each other a milk shake.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant's tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when the same turtle that bit him on the tail all those years ago wanders up to the river. The elephant rears back a leg and kicks the turtle as hard as he can, sending him flying way off into the jungle. "Why did you do that?" the giraffe asks. "When we both were babies, that turtle bit my tail for no reason," the elephant replied. "Wow! You must have a good memory!" exclaimed the giraffe. "Yep!" said the elephant. "I've got Turtle-Recall."
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, elephant, time
Did you hear about the boy who was told to do 100 lines? He drew 100 cats on the paper. He thought the teacher had said lions.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, teacher
Why don't lobsters share? They re shellfish.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof!
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
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