The best animal jokes

Why did the bareback performer ride his horse? Because it got too heavy to carry.
Vote:
has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
The friend of my mother has taken look at the photo on which I was and has said: "yeah, the stepfather of Johny is a real expert of breeding of meaty pig types."
Vote:
has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, fat, food, insulting
I threw a ball for my dog... It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket.
Vote:
has 52.68 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: animal, birthday, dog, food
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country. After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!" She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?" The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try. The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157." The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said. "If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"
Vote:
has 52.63 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, math
What did the flower say to be the bee? "Buzz off you stupid ugly horny cunt."
Vote:
has 52.63 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, dirty, vulgar
If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.
Vote:
has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, Chuck Norris
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, drunk
Pavlov walks into a bar. The phone rings, and he says, "Damn, I forgot to feed the dog."
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dog, phone
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple? A: The Holocaust.
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, food
When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
<<<84858687
More jokes →
Page 84 of 153.