The best animal jokes

A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm, puts the dog on the bar and announces that the dog can talk and that he has $100 he's willing to bet anyone who says he can't. The bartender quickly takes the bet and the owner looks at the dog and asks, "What's the thing on top of this building which keeps the rain from coming inside?" The dog answers "ROOF." The bartender says, "Who are you kidding? I'm not paying." The dogs owner says, "How about double or nothing and I'll ask him something else". The bartender agrees and the owner turns to the dog and asks, "Who was the greatest ballplayer of all time". The dog answers with a muffled "RUTH." With that the bartender picks them both up and throws them out the door. As they bounce on the sidewalk the dog looks at his owner and says "DiMaggio?".
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, dog
What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs? An elephant with diarrhea.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, elephant, health
"Waiter, what is this hare doing in my salad?" "I believe he's eating your lettuce."
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
What do you get when you cross a bumble bee with a rabbit? A honey bunny.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What happened to the tiger who took a bath three times a day? After a week he was spotless.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What is a dolphin's favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Have you read the book, "100-mile Horse Trek" Who wrote it? Major Bumsore.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why did the bareback performer ride his horse? Because it got too heavy to carry.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common? A: They are both baked chickens.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, weed
The friend of my mother has taken look at the photo on which I was and has said: "yeah, the stepfather of Johny is a real expert of breeding of meaty pig types."
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, fat, food, insulting
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