The best animal jokes

Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Why don't cows ever have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
What do you get if you cross a skunk and an owl? A bird that stinks but doesn't give a hoot.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, game
A man moved to a mountain top to get rid of the hustle and be alone. One day he heard a knock at the door and no one was there but then he looked down and there sat a snail and it said "it is quite cold out here can I come in?" The man shouted "NO why don't you all understand I want to be alone!" and he kicked the snail down the mountain. One year later there was a knock at the door and no one was there and then he looked down and there again sat a snail and it said, "What did you do that for?"
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, time, travel, weather
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
What is the slowest racehorse in the world? A clotheshorse.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What goes "oom... oom"? A: A cow walking backward!
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication
A blonde and her husband were driving home, when they hit a rabit. They both got out of the car and stood over the poor creature. The blonde and her husband just stood their, when she said "Oh I know." So she when in the car and rumaged through her purse and came out with what looked a bottle. She poured it on the rabit and they both got in the car. Suddenly the rabit got up hopped a little bit and waved, hopped a little and waved, hopped to the top of the hill and waved. Then dissapered over it. The husband just stared at his wife and said "Honey, what did you pour on that rabit?" His wife just said "Hair Restorer with a permanent wave."
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has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, car, driving, life
Three rabbits escape from a testing lab and find an entire field full of carrots. They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The next morning, they find an entire field full of female rabbits with no males in sight. They screw themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The next morning, the rabbits get to talking. "I'm gonna go back to that field of carrots," says one. "I'm gonna go back to those cute little rabbits," says the second. "I'm going back to the lab," says the third. "I'm dying for a cigarette."
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has 51.55 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, food
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