Why do you never see zebras or antelopes at Victoria Station?
Because it's a mane-lion station.
What do you call a show full of lions?
The mane event.
Why was the lion-tamer fined?
He parked on a yellow lion.
What is the fiercest flower in the garden?
The tiger lily.
What has antlers, pulls Father Christmas sleigh and is made of cement?
I don't know.
A reindeer.
What about the cement?
I just threw that in to make it hard.
How do you weigh a whale?
On Whale Weigh Scales.
What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper?
A slippery customer.
Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
He always said "Neigh"
‘I spilled spot remover on my dog.
Now he’s gone.’
Steven Wright
Sharks are not living on the sea because they can't breath on continent.
They live on a sea, because Chuck Norris doesn't.
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