Q: How do tax accountants make a bold fashion statement? A: Wear their dark grey socks instead of the light grey.
Recently, I've been using the Bible for support. I've got a wobbly coffee table.
Q: What do lipstick and mascara do when they get in a fight? A: They make up.
Did you hear about the blonde who brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?
According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a women are their eyes. And women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.
A really bad impressionist walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the wrong face?"
Woman: When you're finished with me, will my husband think I'm beautiful? Beautician: Maybe. Does he still drink a lot?
According to Apple what is the leading cause of iphone 6 overheating? Downloading images of Candice Swanepoel.
Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, "I'm Eddie, I'm here to pick up Betty. We're going for spaghetti, is she ready?" No. The second beau came to the door and said, "I'm Joe, I'm here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?" No. The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. "Hello, my name is Chuck." The farmer shot Chuck.