The best beauty jokes

One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked the class for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice. First, she called on Little Lisa, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it." "Very good, Lisa," replied the teacher. She then called on Little Tommy. "My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully," he said. "Excellent, Michael!" Then, the teacher called on Little Johnny... Last night, during supper, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, Beautiful, just fucking beautiful!"
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has 49.05 % from 126 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, family, little Johnny, teacher
My eyelids are so sexy, I can't keep my eyes off them.
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has 48.95 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: beauty
Q: How does Jesus celebrate Easter? A: He gets a manicure, pedicure, and has his nails polished.
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has 47.87 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: beauty, christian, easter
Johny met his classmate from high school after ten years who was still very beautiful. As he met her, he told her only: "Hi Ann, I am pleased to see you again after so many years." Ann took a look at his pants and said: "I know that you´re pleased."
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has 46.97 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, school, sex, time
I have two accounts on Facebook it means I have two faces. It's really good because one is cuter to attract people.
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has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: beauty, Facebook, internet
Think of the hottest woman. Chuck Norris did her.
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has 46.18 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: beauty, Chuck Norris, sex, women
Chuck Norris often walks on Bikini Atoll during tests to get a tan.
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: beauty, Chuck Norris
We're hoping Chuck Norris doesn't go bald on top. It's a bad look with his mullet.
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: beauty, Chuck Norris
What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman? "Immediately start downloading it."
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has 43.46 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: beauty, geek, IT, women
Yesterday I was at the hairdresser to cut my hair. The cutting of the hair costs 3 Euros but I had only 1 Euro. So I have asked the hairdresser if she will cut my hair also for 1 Euro? She said yes, so I was glad. Ok, it is not perfect, one side of my head is cut a little bit more than the other one, maybe I look a bit weird, but nobody is perfect.
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has 41.83 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: beauty, money, ugly
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