The best beauty jokes

Q: What is the only thing you will ever hear being said to a Mexican wearing a 3pc suit? A: "Will the defendant please rise".
Vote: has 58.77 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, mexican, prison
There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You’re beautiful!” and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said “You’re cute!” Well, the wife was disappointed because instead of “beautiful” it was “cute.” She said “What happened to ‘beautiful’?” His reply was “The drugs are wearing off!”
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, drug, lawyer, wife
Q: You know why women haven't landed on the moon? A: Because there is no shopping centre.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, travel, women
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love. In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
Vote: has 57.16 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, college, drunk, love, school
According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a women are their eyes. And women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.
Vote: has 56.84 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, men, women
I wonder what happened to that dumb blonde I went out with. I dyed my hair!
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, blonde, life, stupid
Think of the hottest woman. Chuck Norris did her.
Vote: has 55.71 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, Chuck Norris, sex, women
A beautiful woman in her thirties was passing through customs in London, when the customs official asks her what the reason for her trip to London was. Business or pleasure, he asks? Sadness and pleasure! She says to the officer! Why? Well, my 75 years old husband has just died and I came to his funeral! My condolences, says the officer! It must be a very difficult and painful time you're going through! Not really, this is my pleasure! I'm so sad because only now I found out that he was dead broke and did not leave a dime, a penny, not even a will for me!
Vote: has 55.57 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, beauty, business, travel, women
I have two accounts on Facebook it means I have two faces. It's really good because one is cuter to attract people.
Vote: has 55.34 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, Facebook, internet
Nothing beats a woman with a beautiful singing voice. Except for Chris Brown.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, celebrity, life, music, women