The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later, a donkey walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the donkey's mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!" "Not really," said the donkey. "Your name is written inside the cover."
Q: Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? A: When Joseph served in Pharaoh's court.
The Bible says I'll pay for my sins. I already do, Escorts, drugs and alcohol don't come free.
A man and wife were having argument about who should make the pot of tea in the morning. The wife told him that he should do it because he gets up first. The husband said that she was in charge of the cooking in the house, making it her job. The wife said that even the bible says that the man should do it. The husband told her to show him and if it did he would make it. She fetched the bible and opened up the new testament, showing him at the top of several pages that said "Hebrews".
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
Q: Who was the best business woman in the Bible? A: Pharoah's daughter – she drew a profit from the rush at the bank.
Q: Who was the smartest man in the Bible? A: Abraham. He knew a Lot.
“I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then it dawned on me . . . they’re cramming for their final exam.”
Q: Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? A: Samson. He brought the house down.
Q: Which Bible character had no parents? A: Joshua, son of Nun (Joshua 1:1).