One step forward, 12 floors down.
My Chinese friend got really sick one day and had to go to a hospital. I went to see him the next day, but he just kept whispering "Chun Yu Yan" over and over – and then died. I was very sad and googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means "You're standing on my oxygen tube."
A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear. No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?" The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler." "I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker on the windshield." The general said, "Drive on!" The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker." The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on!" The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"
Did you hear about the cannibal family who were caught spying by the witch-doctor? They were given a right roasting.
Q: What is the worst thing about a vegetable? A: Spitting them back up in a wheelchair.
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine. I guess that was why several of us died of tuberculosis.
Q: What was Hitler's favorite drink? A: Concentrated jews.
The worst place to have a heart attack is during a gama of cherades. ...Especially if the people you are playing with, are really bad guessers.
Q: How does every black joke start? A: With the white guy looking over his shoulder.
Two best friends are lying on the beach and discussing: "Last night I saw a terrible nightmare…" "What did you see?" "I saw my mother-in-law swimming in the sea and being chase by a shark…" "Wow horror!" "Horror?! You say nothing! She almost got away!"