The best black humor jokes

A Liberal died and a friend went around collecting for a fund for his funeral. A woman was asked to donate ten dollars. "Ten dollars?" she said. "It only takes ten dollars to bury a Liberal? Here's a hundred - go bury 10 of them!"
Vote: has 68.97 % from 61 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, democrat, funeral, money
Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
Vote: has 68.86 % from 261 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, history, Hitler, jewish
I got in trouble for telling a joke in 5th grade. Now I have to keep 250 feet away from all schools...
Vote: has 68.80 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, communication, dirty, school
I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today. I had to drop the bomb two or three times before she finally got it.
Vote: has 68.77 % from 83 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, relationship, terrorist
You might be a redneck if the Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
Vote: has 68.73 % from 49 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, Halloween, redneck, wife
So a little kid and a child molester start walking into a forest. They keep walking for what seems like hours, and it gets darker and darker and darker, and the forest gets deeper and deeper and deeper. The kid turns to the child molester and he says "Gee mister, it sure is scary out here!" The child molester says "How do you think I feel, kid? I'm gonna have to walk out of this forest by myself!"
Vote: has 68.72 % from 68 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
The best thing after an intensive argument is the peace-sex. But I hate when I argue with my father-in-law.
Vote: has 68.54 % from 75 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, dad, gay, sex
Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes. The first man said, "My Ryan loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky." The second man said, "My Ross was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake." The third man said, "My Jack was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time."
Vote: has 68.35 % from 167 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: airplane, black humor, death, funeral, gay
Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat’s milk. The older of the mothers pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. And they start reminiscing. "This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would be 24 years old now." "Yes, I remember him as a baby" says the other mother cheerfully. "He’s a martyr now though" mum confides. "Oh, so sad, dear" says the other. "And this is my second son Kalid. He would be 21." "Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly hair when he was born." "He’s a martyr too" says mum quietly. "Oh, gracious me…" says the other. "And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would be 18," she whispers. "Yes" says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school." "He’s a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes. After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says, "They blow up so fast, don’t they?"
Vote: has 68.20 % from 103 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, animal, black humor, food
Q: How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof? A: Depends on how thin you slice them.
Vote: has 68.02 % from 127 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid


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