The best black humor jokes

I got in trouble during high school for masturbating in the showers. Apparently it completely ruined the trip to Auschwitz.
has 69.66 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: black humor
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is white, plastic, and dangerous to children. You put groceries in the other.
has 69.53 % from 141 votes. More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, kids, music
What happens if you upset a cannibal? You get into hot water.
has 69.39 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: black humor
Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
has 69.34 % from 151 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, morbid
Q: Why are Germans bad cooks? A: The only good one killed himself.
has 69.31 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, food, Hitler, work
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: "Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers". She replies: "Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?" To which he responds: "No, you've got bowel cancer."
has 69.14 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
Knock-knock Who is there? A shattered penis with many diseases. What kind of illness? Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis... Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
has 68.94 % from 331 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
Two best friends are lying on the beach and discussing: "Last night I saw a terrible nightmare…" "What did you see?" "I saw my mother-in-law swimming in the sea and being chase by a shark…" "Wow horror!" "Horror?! You say nothing! She almost got away!"
has 68.73 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: black humor
A man returns to the U.S. from Africa feeling very ill. He goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital, to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings. “This is your doctor. We’ve had the results back from your tests and we’ve found you have an extremely nasty virus, which is extremely contagious!” “Oh my gosh,” cries the man. He’s in a panic now. “What are you going to do, doctor?” “Well we’re going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes, and pita bread.” “Will that cure me?” asked the man hopefully. The doctor replied, “Well no, but … it’s the only food we can get under the door.”
has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food, health, hospital
You might be a redneck if the Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
has 68.61 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Halloween, redneck, wife
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