The best black humor jokes

The worst place to have a heart attack is during a gama of cherades. ...Especially if the people you are playing with, are really bad guessers.
Vote: has 69.31 % from 38 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
Two best friends are lying on the beach and discussing: "Last night I saw a terrible nightmare…" "What did you see?" "I saw my mother-in-law swimming in the sea and being chase by a shark…" "Wow horror!" "Horror?! You say nothing! She almost got away!"
Vote: has 69.28 % from 46 votes. Send joke:
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Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
Vote: has 69.25 % from 136 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, black humor, morbid
So a little kid and a child molester start walking into a forest. They keep walking for what seems like hours, and it gets darker and darker and darker, and the forest gets deeper and deeper and deeper. The kid turns to the child molester and he says "Gee mister, it sure is scary out here!" The child molester says "How do you think I feel, kid? I'm gonna have to walk out of this forest by myself!"
Vote: has 69.22 % from 73 votes. Send joke:
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How do you know Charles Sweeney was dyslexic? He wanted to order the flaming saganagi, but he accidentally ordered a flaming Nagasaki.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, geography, health, war
Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
Vote: has 69.04 % from 287 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, history, Hitler, jewish
There's some soldiers in Vietnam. And they've been pinned down in their trench for days. Finally one guy says,"Fuck this I really have to pee guys. Lay down covering fire, i'll run into the bushes. When I'm done I'll give a signal and you can give me covering fire while i run back." So they lay down fire, and he runs off into the jungle. But he's gone for a good half an hour, they're finally convinced that he's been murdered by Charlie when they hear the signal. So they lay down fire and he sprints out of the jungle and leaps back into the trench. So obviously they're pretty confused. They ask "what the hell took you so long man?" The guy says, "well i was just finishing up my business, when I met this beautiful Vietnamese girl, and we just started having sex right there. we did every position imaginable, missionary, doggy style, everything. It was great." One of his buddies asks "Well did you get any head?" He replies "There was no head."
Vote: has 68.93 % from 76 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, military, sex
Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire? Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.
Vote: has 68.80 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor
Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet? A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Vote: has 68.80 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, geography, morbid, sport
Q: What do pregnant teenagers and their unborn babies have in common? A: Both their moms are going to kill them!
Vote: has 68.60 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: baby, black humor, death, morbid, teen


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