A magician comes to a seniors' home for entertainment afternoon: "Aaaaand? Is everybody heeere?" Seniors, enthusiastically, "Yeaaaah!" Magician, winking, "But not for looooong...!"
Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog. When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
I got in trouble for telling a joke in 5th grade. Now I have to keep 250 feet away from all schools...
Black Jokes are not funny I have a black guy in my family way up in my family tree. He's been hanging there for quite a while.
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
Q: How many Ethiopians can you fit into a telephone booth? A: All of them.
Q: What's the difference between Jesus Christ and a painting of Jesus Christ? A: It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
Q: Why did Hitler kill himself? A: He saw his gas bill.
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever. Me: What's that hunny? Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk. Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
What do an airport and a illegal abortion have in common? The Hanger.