The best black humor jokes

Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart? A: With a knife.
Vote: has 59.75 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

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What's the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind? The dashboard.
Vote: has 59.74 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, celebrity
Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard? Shut up, and give me more bullets.
Vote: has 59.58 % from 156 votes. Send joke:

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Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff. The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors. Bad News: There were three empty seats.
Vote: has 59.20 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, car, lawyer
Q: What do you tell someone you didn't see at New Year's Eve? A: I haven't seen you for a year!
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, new year, time
Q: How can you tell you have a really bad case of acne? A: It's when the blind try to read your face.
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More jokes about: black humor, health, ugly
Q. What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common? A. They both live off dead Beatles.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, music
Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation? He said, "So that I can feed my lads with m'lasses."
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More jokes about: black humor, food
First Cannibal: "Who was that girl I saw you with last night?" Second Cannibal: "That was no girl, that was my supper."
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More jokes about: black humor, food, women
Q: What do the Jews hate most about the Holocaust? A: The cost.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, jewish, money