What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall? Art.
Anal sex is like your first car - you dont really want it, but your dad gave it to you anyways.
After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, "Ma'am, I've got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?" After quickly thinking it over, she responds, "I'll have the bad news first doctor". The doctor replies, "We'll, I'm not sure how to put this, and I'm sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair". Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. "Doctor, if that's the bad news, what's the good news". The doctor replies, "He's dead".
Q: What did one casket say to the sick casket? A: Is that you coughin'?
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple? A: The Holocaust.
What did the cannibal say when he was full? I couldn't eat another mortal.
Q: What do you call a flying Jew? A: Ashes.
There are four people from different counties on the Empire State Building. One is Japanese, one is French, one is Mexican, and one is American. They all want to throw something off the building that they have a lot of in their country. The Japanese guy goes first. He throws off sushi. There is a lot of sushi in my country. Next is the French guy. He throws off a condom. There is too much love in my country. Next is the Mexican. He throws off a taco. There is too much taco in my country. Next goes the American. He looks around him and picks the Mexican up and throws him of the building and says: There are too much Mexicans in my country.
My dad died on 9-11. He was the best amateur bomber on Iraq's flight team.