Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
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Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars.
The last one was called the Hindenburg.
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There is man sitting in a bar who is really, really drunk.
When the bar closes he gets up to go home.
He stumbles and falls couple of times and finally manages to get out of the door.
As he gathers himself, he sees a nun passing by.
He stumbles over to her and starts punching her in the face.
The nun is shocked beyond belief, but before she could say anything, he leans over and punches her again.
This time the nun hits the pavement.
The drunk stumbles over to her, kicks her in the butt, picks her up and throws her against the wall.
By now the nun is very weak and can barely move.
He leans over her, grabbing her by the collar of her habit and says, "Not feeling too STRONG tonight, I thought you would be tougher Batman!"
Chuck Norris and Justin Bieber once had a singing contest, the loser had to never hit puberty.
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Friendly reminder that Adele and Taylor Swift are the same age, yet one is pregnant and another stuck in middle school.
Q: What explorer was the best at Hiding and Seek?
A: Marco Polo.
CBS hired Chuck Norris to replace Charlie Sheen, now the show is called Ten and half Men.
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Chuck Norris told Anne Robinson she was the weakest link and made her leave the stage.
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Charles isn't in charge.
Chuck is!
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Lehman Brothers owed Chuck Norris a fiver.
When he asked for payback, well, you know the rest.
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