When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
When Bruce Banner's angry he turn into the Hulk. When the Hulk's angry he turns into Chuck Norris
Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
Charles isn't in charge. Chuck is!
How come there aren't that many jokes about Jim Jones? The punchlines are too long.
Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars. The last one was called the Hindenburg.
There is man sitting in a bar who is really, really drunk. When the bar closes he gets up to go home. He stumbles and falls couple of times and finally manages to get out of the door. As he gathers himself, he sees a nun passing by. He stumbles over to her and starts punching her in the face. The nun is shocked beyond belief, but before she could say anything, he leans over and punches her again. This time the nun hits the pavement. The drunk stumbles over to her, kicks her in the butt, picks her up and throws her against the wall. By now the nun is very weak and can barely move. He leans over her, grabbing her by the collar of her habit and says, "Not feeling too STRONG tonight, I thought you would be tougher Batman!"
Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris. He died a year later.
I just watched a documentary about Adolf Hitler. He sure was a popular guy. Everywhere he went, people shouted "Hi Hitler" and gave him a little wave.