Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas. He just hired Chuck Norris.
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas? Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
A school bus driver stopped the vehicle to take little George out. The kid opened the door and saw his grandmother reaching her hands to grab him. The driver though, to make sure that that person is really a family member, asks the kid. "Is this really your grandmother?" "Yes. She visits every Christmas!" "Very good! And when she stays at he rest of the year?" the driver insists. "At the airport!," says the kid and continues, "Whenever we feel like, we go there and we take her home..."
A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars? A: Elfis!