The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas. He just hired Chuck Norris.
Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Q: What do you call Santa Claus with muscles? A: Mr. XMass
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get? A: Mistle-toes!
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas? Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve? Answer: "Halo there!"
Q: What do cannibal tax advisors do after their office Christmas Dinner? A: Toast their clients.