You know you're getting old when Santa starts looking younger.
How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar?
Both their balls are decoration only.
Yo mama so stupid someone said Christmas was around the corner and she went looking for it.
Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
Thanksgiving is the day men start getting in shape... to play Santa Claus.
Q: What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common?
A: They both have balls just for decoration.
Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
Vote:
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"