Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas?
A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing.
"Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols."
"Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?"
Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
Jesus said to John, "Come forth and receive eternal life."
He came fifth and received a toaster.
Yo momma is so poor for Christmas she got a box, put two sticks on it, spun it and said son here's your xbox 360.
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men?
A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train set.
"If you get your train," I told him, "your dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?"
The boy became very quiet.
So, moving the conversation along, I asked, "What else would you like Santa to bring you?"
He promptly replied, "Another train."
Vote:
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad.
He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
Vote:
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Q: What do cannibal tax advisors do after their office Christmas Dinner?
A: Toast their clients.
Vote:
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Vote: