Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
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In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine.
But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series.
We know it as Forged in the fire.
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Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder.
Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky.
Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
E=mc squared.
E multiplied by mc squared=Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
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Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
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The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.
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