The best Chuck Norris jokes

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
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has 38.57 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: beer, bible, Chuck Norris, religious, wine
Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
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has 38.50 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
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has 38.50 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay. Big mistake. You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
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has 38.49 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, teacher
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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has 38.41 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, Chuck Norris, war
E=mc squared. E multiplied by mc squared=Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Chuck Norris' personal airplane is called Air Force Chuck.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: air force, airplane, Chuck Norris
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids. Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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