When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
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When Chuck Norris plays the game Clue, the answer is always everyone in every room with a roundhouse kick!
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
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Chuck was once on the Olympics and he won all the medals but he was disqualifyed for roundhouse kicking the judges because they misspelled his name.
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Chuck Norris doesn't solve math - math solves Chuck Norris.
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Insurance never covers you against damage sustained by Chuck Norris, as it's classed as an Act of God!
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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