The best dirty jokes

( boy 1 ) : you need to say what ever i say in backwards. ( boy 2 ) : okay. ( boy 1 ) : A B C ( boy 2 ) : C B A ( boy 1 ) : 1 2 3 ( boy 2 ) : 3 2 1 ( boy 1 ) : okay lets make this harder : CRACK MY FINGER ( Boy 2 ) : Finger my crack .
Vote:
has 72.98 % from 481 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic? A: Snap-on tools!
Vote:
has 72.91 % from 393 votes. More jokes about: dirty, lesbian, mechanic
An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs. The dentist said: "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist." "I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."
Vote:
has 72.91 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: dentist, dirty, husband, old people, sex
Little gay Johnny asks Billy, "If you went camping and woke up with a condom in your butt, would you tell anyone? Billy says, "No way, that'd be embarassing". Johnny then asks, "Wanna go camping?"
Vote:
has 72.80 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A woman heads to the doctors office for her usual checkup. While there, the doc notices a strange rash on her chest in the shape of an H and inquires about it, "Oh, my boyfriend likes to wear his Harvard sweater during sex." The next day, another woman comes in, for a checkup. While there, the doctor notices a strange rash on her chest in the shape of a Y and inquires about it,"Oh, my boyfriend is really into wearing his Yale sweater during sex." The next day, another woman comes in, again, for a simple checkup. This woman too has a rash on her chest, and the doctor, catching on with the trend, asks,"So, Does your boyfriend go to Wisconsin?" The girl replies, "Nah, but my girlfriend goes to Michigan."
Vote:
has 72.79 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Vote:
has 72.78 % from 171 votes. More jokes about: dirty, game, masturbation, sex
An ugly bloke walks into a pub with a huge grin on his face. "What are you so happy about ?" asks the landlord. "Well, I live by the railway and on my way home last night I noticed a woman tied to the tracks. I cut her free and we shagged all night !" "Did you get a blow job ?" asks the landlord. "No ..." he says, "I never found the head."
Vote:
has 72.78 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
Vote:
has 72.70 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: dirty
After 20 years of marriage, a wife finds out that her husband had been f*cking her for the past 20 years with a dildo! she is so angry she asks her husband to "Explain the dildo". The husband replies "explain the kids?!"
Vote:
has 72.68 % from 154 votes. More jokes about: dirty, husband, kids, marriage, time
Pr*stitute in the police station. The desk officer sayes "so when did you realise you were raped ?" She replies ... "when the cheque bounced !"
Vote:
has 72.62 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: dirty
<<<34353637
More jokes →
Page 34 of 95.