Q: How do you know when a machanic has had sex?
A: Two of his fingers are clean.
What does a Rubik's cube and a pen*s have in common?
They both get harder the longer you play with them.
Two condoms walk into a gay bar, look at each other and say "let's get shit-faced!"
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what that pussy needs.
Vote:
Hey, you wanna do a 68?
You go down on me, and I'll owe you one.
Why is the position 69 like driving car in a rush hour traffic?
Cause asshole is always in front of you.
Q: Whats the Diffenence between kinky and perverted?
A1: Kinky is when you tickle your girl friends ass with a feather.
A2: Perverted is when you use the whole chicken...
Vote:
Knock-Knock
Who is there?
A long penis with a naked head.
Come in please we were waiting for you.
Vote:
A man is in Vegas where he lost all of his money so he can't pay for a cab to return to the airport.
He sees a cab and begs the driver to give him a free ride to the airport but the cab driver declines.
The next year the man returns to Vegas and get filthy rich when he decides to leave for the airport.
There is a huge line of cabs, and at the very end of this line was the very driver who never gave him a ride the previous year.
The man walks up to the front cab "Excuse me, sir if you give me a free ride to the airport I'll let you give me a handjob."
The driver declines immediately.
The man then asks all the drivers in this line the same thing.
When he gets to the last driver, he pays the fee and the cab driver begins moving, when he moved by the line, the man puts two thumbs up through the window so all the other drivers could see.
I went to a pharmacy and asked for a black condom.
Manager wondered and asked me, "why black sir?"
"My friend's husband died; I want to console her," I said.