The best dirty jokes

Q: What did dick say to rubber? A: "Cover me I'm going in."
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex
Q: What did Snow White say to Pinocchio when she was sitting on his face? A: "Lie to me! Lie to me!"
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex
Three guys die and go to Hell. Satan asks the first guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a candle maker." So, Satan burns off the guy's d**k. Satan asks the second guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a rope maker." So, Satan rips off the guy's d**k with a rope. Satan asks the third guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" The guy smiles and says, "He made lollipops."
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has 67.69 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty
Q: What is the difference between a rooster and a whore? A: The rooster goes cock doodle do and the whore goes any cock do!
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, vulgar, work
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity? A: The crayons are still sticky.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, disgusting, sex
Q: Why are gays so happy? A: Becuase the luck does not have the courage turning back to them.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, life
Why do people say 'Grow some balls?' Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding.
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has 67.61 % from 101 votes. More jokes about: dirty
There are a hundred holes in the body of a woman; one of them would be filled with a penis and 99 others could be filled with money.
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has 67.52 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, money, sex, women
Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."
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has 67.47 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, relationship, sex, stupid
Friend: Dude, I can't stop dreaming about my crush. Me: Well imagine this... You're home alone, and your crush comes over to visit. Friend: Ok I can see it... Me: She walks into your room and you're just sitting there. Friend: Uh-huh.. I'm likin' this. Me: Ok. So she walks in front of you, takes her pants off. She's not wearing any underwear.. And then she sits on you. Friend: Oh-ho-hoo.. Whatta' naughty girl. Me: Yeah, ok. Don't get dirty on me. So she's sitting on you. And then... she starting shitting in you. Right then and there, you find out you're a toilet. Friend: I hate you...
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has 67.41 % from 145 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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