The best dirty jokes

Q: What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers? A: If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit!
Vote: has 64.28 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, dirty, gay, sex, sport
Little Johnny walks into his parent's room one night to find them having sex. "Mom? What are you doing?" he asks his mom. "Making a cake" his mom replies. Later that week, Little Johnny walks asks his mom in the car "Were you and daddy making a cake on the couch" he asks. "Yeah. Why?" his mom asks, confused and worried. "Because I licked the icing off the couch! It was delicious!" he responded.
Vote: has 64.28 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, dirty, disgusting, little Johnny, sex
Two sperms. The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?" The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
Vote: has 64.23 % from 32 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, time
There was once a lady making a stew for dinner when she found she had no onions,so with no time to waste she raced to the shops, burst in saying could i have some onions please. The shopkeeper replied sorry lady we are fresh out of onions. The lady said but i really need onions and gave all the reasons why in one big sentence. The shopkeeper said look lady,I`ll put it to you another way and continued to ask her- if you take the o from tomato what do you have? The lady said tomat,Yes said the man and if you take the o from potato what do you have? The lady said potat. Yes said the man behind the counter,now if you take the fuck out of onions what do you have? "But there's no fuck in onions",said the lady,Yes said the man, That's what I have been trying to tell you!"
Vote: has 64.21 % from 62 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
Two condoms walk into a gay bar, look at each other and say "let's get shit-faced!"
Vote: has 64.21 % from 62 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, gay
Man comes home to his wife and says to her: "With the new pair of glasses, you look like sh.t." "But I don't have a new pair of glasses..." she replies. "But, I do."
Vote: has 64.09 % from 52 votes. Send joke:
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I like your style I like your class but most of all i like your ass.
Vote: has 64.09 % from 65 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, dirty, poems
I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she bent over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong. Moral of the story: she really loves me underneath it all.
Vote: has 63.97 % from 87 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, school
A young boy caught sight of his mother changing one day, and asked her what that was that she had between her legs. "That is something you're never going to talk about again. And you shouldn't touch it either, because it has teeth." Many years went by, and the boy never touched any girl in between her legs, because he was very scared. One day, however, he met the love of his life and, in time, they got married. On their wedding night, his wife asked him to touch her there. "No," he said, "it's got teeth." "Silly goose!" she said. She spread her legs wide for him to see. "See? No teeth!" "Well, I'm not surprised," the man said. "Not with gums like that."
Vote: has 63.93 % from 55 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
Yo momma's clitoris is as long as my dick.
Vote: has 63.93 % from 55 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, sex, Yo mama


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