Q: What did the prick say to the balls? A: You guys hang around here while I go inside!
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
What do dogs and women have in common? They both like 12-inch bones.
Boy - "dear Santa, for xmas, I would like a baby brother." Santa - "Send me your mother."
One day a mom and her son went to the zoo. There they saw two monkeys having sex. The son asked "What are they doing?". The mom said "Ohh they are making frosting", then they saw hippos doing it then he said "Mom what are they doing?" "Making frosting" she said. Later that night he saw there mom doing it. In the morning he said "Mom you and dad were making frosting so i ate it!"
Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
Me - Can you go to your moms room? Friend - Yeah, why? Me - I left my pants in there. Friend - Fuck you!
Hey guys. Bet your female friend that she can't use both of her elbows to touch her belly button. Thank me later.
"I shall call it squishy, and he will be mine. He will be my squishy." "Let go of my boob."
What's the only thing white girls swallow? Starbucks.