The best dirty jokes

A guy picks up a pr*stitute and proceeds to spend a couple of hours with her at a seedy motel. A few days later, he finds that he has caught crabs. He chases down the prostitute and says, "hey bitch, you gave me crabs". She replies, "what'd you expect for ten bucks? Lobster?"
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has 58.87 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: How can you tell if a lesbian is butch? A: She kick starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.
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has 58.80 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, lesbian
Insurance companies are trying to set new guidelines before approving Viagra coverage. What will they use to set those guidelines? A growth chart.
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has 58.67 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: dirty, money, viagra
Q: What's long and hard and full of semen? A: A submarine.
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: dirty, time
Q: What is the difference between a rooster and a whore? A: The rooster goes cock doodle do and the whore goes any cock do!
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, vulgar, work
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
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has 58.58 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dirty
On a pair of boxers: Caution! Contains nuts.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What do a rattlesnake and a soft penis have in common? You can't f**k with either one.
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? A: Because they can. Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches? A: Same reason.
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has 58.51 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: dirty, dog
How are Justin Bieber and a Christmas tree similar? Both their balls are decoration only.
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has 58.51 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, music
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