Yo mama is so dirty when she jumped in the bath water the water jumped out and said "No I'm good."
I know an archaeologist who can tell you what period a tampon was from.
Q: What did the letter O said to the letter Q? A: Dude, your dick is hanging out.
How do you make a snooker table laugh. Put your hands in its pocket and tickle its balls.
Q: What's a blonde's favorite drink A: A cocktail.
Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."
I'd have a comeback for that, but all my come's backed up in your throat.
Aaron Hernandez goes to prison as a tight end. He'll come out a wide receiver!
Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
In school, we had to do a skit demonstrating key concepts of the English language. My skit on the "diphthong" clearly demonstrated that the string micro-bikini was not a wise choice.