The best dirty jokes

I see you ordered the most expensive item on the menu for our first date. I hope you realize that it comes with a side order of my dick.
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has 60.81 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty
Q: What do you call a lesbian with a big tongue? A: Well hung.
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has 60.81 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: dirty, lesbian
Yo momma's clitoris is as long as my dick.
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has 60.76 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Yo mama
There was three girls and they all had boyfriends and separate rooms. The mom walked by all the rooms. The first room she hears laughing, the second room she heard screaming and the third was totally quiet. The mom was suspicious, so she asked the third girl why was she so quiet she replied, "My boyfriend said not to talk with my mouth full."
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has 60.75 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Two rednecks, Bubba And Billy Bob, were walking through a pasture. Bubba sees a sheep caught up in a fence and says to Billy Bob "I'm gonna get me some of that"! Bubba goes over and sticks the sheep's back feet in his rubber boots, unzips his pants and starts to have sex with the sheep. He looks over his shoulder at Billy Bob and says "Do you want some of this"? Billy Bob replies "yes let me see if I can get my shirt caught up in the fence".
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has 60.75 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, redneck, sex, stupid
Q: What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common? A: Wet noses.
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has 60.69 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, dog
Q: Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? A: Because dad can’t keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.
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has 60.67 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dirty
I'd have a comeback for that, but all my come's backed up in your throat.
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has 60.66 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty
We must admit that we want to be like some animals. We all want to be strong like a bear, we want to have a sharp sight like a falcon, the intelligence like an owl, the endurance like a horse, we want to sing like a skylark, we want to be running like a fox and of course we all want to have the salivas like a dragon lizard.
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has 60.66 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, horse, life
Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
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has 60.65 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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