The best dirty jokes

Q: What do you call a one-man quickie? A: A yankee.
Vote: has 45.10 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How big are the pastro's beds? A: Oh c'mon, it knows every little kid.
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, kids, religious, sex
A New Zealander walking along the road with a sheep under each arm. He meets another New Zealander who says "you sheerin' mate?" and the first guy replies "naw, they're all mine"
Vote: has 44.84 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!
Vote: has 44.58 % from 74 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: catholic, dirty, priest, teen
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."
Vote: has 44.47 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

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Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
Vote: has 43.90 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How can you tell if a lesbian is butch? A: She kick starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.
Vote: has 43.90 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, lesbian
Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.
Vote: has 43.73 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, dirty, kids, sex
North America, few hundred years ago. An indian is sitting, smokes a pipe. Breathes in, breathes out. His son comes up to him: Daddy, I have a question Well, what is it? Why do we have such long names? Yankees, for example, have much shorter ones - John, Simon, Nicolas and similar. Our names come from nature. When your mother was born, there was a wonderful dew, so that is why she is called Fresh Dew. When your sister was born, there was a brilliant sunset. So that why she got the name Red Sunset. So, do you have any more questions, Fucking Bison?
Vote: has 43.46 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

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What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous? Get back! I have no idea how big it grows!
Vote: has 43.43 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

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