Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch?
He's down to four butts a day.
Q: Why is a girls pussy like an ocean?
A: It's really wet and has a Sperm Whale in it.
On Sunday little Johnny with his dad went for bathing.
The ground was slippery.
So poor boy for avoiding of knocking down grabbed his father's penis.
His father smiled and told him: "Oh boy you are lucky. If you were with your mother you were concussion!"
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls?
A: Because they can.
Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches?
A: Same reason.
I got in trouble for telling a joke in 5th grade.
Now I have to keep 250 feet away from all schools...
Vote:
That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
Vote:
One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong.
Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy."
"Like what?" asked Fozzie.
"Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't."
Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that?
You're not a prude or anything."
"No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."
How do you know when a Barbie has her period?
All your tic tacks are gone.
Q: What do a woman and a bar have in common?
A: Liquor in the front, Poker in the back.
Sex is like math:
Add the bed
Subtract the clothes
Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply