Listening to censored hip-hop is like going to a whore for a hug.
Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch?
He's down to four butts a day.
A little old man who's hard of hearing goes to see the doctor. As he can't hear very well, he takes his wife with him.
The doctor examines the man and then says, "Hmm, I think we need to take a stool sample, a urine sample and a sperm sample."
The old man turns to his wife and asks, "What did he say?"
The wife replies, "He said he wants your underwear."
Vote:
What do dogs and women have in common?
They both like 12-inch bones.
What is the difference between mayonnaise and semen?
Mayonnaise doesn't shoot down your throat at 40 miles per hour.
Q: Why did the lumber truck stop?
A: To let the lumber jack off.
What has 100 teeth and eats weiners?
A zipper!
Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course?
A: The 19th hole.
Whats the difference between Paris Hilton and a bowling ball?
You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!
When Viagra first came out my wife and I decided to give it a go to see what all the fuss was about.
I popped the pill and waited the 15 minutes and then it was on for young and old.
We timed the performance to the minute and it all finally subsided at 3 hours and 17 minutes.
I asked the missus what she thought and she simply stated that she couldn't understand what all the hype was about for an extra 17 minutes...