The best dirty jokes

Why did the semen cross the road? Because I wore the wrong sock today.
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has 50.17 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, masturbation
One day, a Sodomite went to his doctor's office to get an HIV blood test. While there, his blood got drawn and he then left. Two weeks later, he was back at his doctor's office in an examination room, waiting for the result of the HIV test. Suddenly, his doctor walks into the examination room and says to the gay guy, "I'm awfully sorry to tell you that the test shows that you're definitely HIV positive." The gay guy then asks the doctor, "So, what needs to be done now, doctor?" The doctor says to the gay dude, "I want you to go home, sit down at your kitchen table and eat 20 hamburgers, 20 hot dogs, 20 pizzas, 20 bags of chips, and 20 gallons of ice cream." The gay then asks his doctor, "How's doing all that gonna help me out with my HIV, doctor?" The doctor then replied, "It's not gonna help you out with your HIV at all but it will definitely teach you what your asshole is really for."
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has 49.83 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, gay, health, sex
Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
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has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, sex, time, women
Girl: Hey wanna know what gets my pussy wet? Boy: what? ;) Girl: Toilet water when I shit out a small whale.
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has 49.45 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What's 72? 69 with 3 people watching!
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has 49.36 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What's the difference between a condom and a coffin? You come in one and you go in the other!
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has 49.26 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A man goes to the doctor about the size if his penis. He says to the doctor "My penis is too small." Doctor gives the man some medicine, says "Drink this everytime you bump into something your penis will grow an inch." So the man thanks the doctor and leaves. He drinks the medicine on his way home he bumps into a lampot so his penis grew an inch. Just a little further down the road he bumps into an Indian guy. A thousand apologies, he penis grows one thousand inches, baffled by his extra long penis he decides to paint it red, hite and blue, and wrapped it round his neck, he decides to go to the cinema, he was watching a dirty movie, sat on the top of the row of seats, all of a sudden this voice comes on the speaker. "Can the man with the red white and blue scarf stop chucking ice cream to the people below?"
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has 49.25 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, doctor, medical, sex
Yo momma is so fat, that when NASA put her on the moon, her breasts were the only things bouncing... just like on earth.
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has 49.25 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fat, insulting, science, Yo mama
Q: Why can't scientists find a cure for AIDS? A: They can't get the laboratory mice to arse f*ck.
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has 48.95 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, health, science, sex
Johny met his classmate from high school after ten years who was still very beautiful. As he met her, he told her only: "Hi Ann, I am pleased to see you again after so many years." Ann took a look at his pants and said: "I know that you´re pleased."
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has 48.95 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, school, sex, time
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