Why did the semen cross the road? Because I wore the wrong sock today.
One day, a Sodomite went to his doctor's office to get an HIV blood test. While there, his blood got drawn and he then left. Two weeks later, he was back at his doctor's office in an examination room, waiting for the result of the HIV test. Suddenly, his doctor walks into the examination room and says to the gay guy, "I'm awfully sorry to tell you that the test shows that you're definitely HIV positive." The gay guy then asks the doctor, "So, what needs to be done now, doctor?" The doctor says to the gay dude, "I want you to go home, sit down at your kitchen table and eat 20 hamburgers, 20 hot dogs, 20 pizzas, 20 bags of chips, and 20 gallons of ice cream." The gay then asks his doctor, "How's doing all that gonna help me out with my HIV, doctor?" The doctor then replied, "It's not gonna help you out with your HIV at all but it will definitely teach you what your asshole is really for."
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
Q: Why can't scientists find a cure for AIDS? A: They can't get the laboratory mice to arse f*ck.
Johny met his classmate from high school after ten years who was still very beautiful. As he met her, he told her only: "Hi Ann, I am pleased to see you again after so many years." Ann took a look at his pants and said: "I know that you´re pleased."
What do you get when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Dough Nuts!
Girl: Babe I just gotta a tattoo of a sea shell on my thigh can you hear the ocean? *Pulls his head to her thigh* Guy: Nope, But I sure can smell the fish.
What do you call a blonde with pig tails? A blowjob with handlebars.
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar on her head? A: All you can eat under a buck.
Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.