The best dirty jokes

Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
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has 47.24 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, sex, Yo mama
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever. Me: What's that hunny? Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk. Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
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has 47.24 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty
Q: Why are pubic hairs curly? A: So you don't poke your eye out.
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has 47.21 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Johnny comes home from school and asks his mom what is a "period". His mom says that "A period is when a woman needs to realease her dead egg cells". Johnny asks what color is it. She says it's red. Johnny said "I have one of those but mine is white and it makes babies."
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has 46.90 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, school, women
My girlfriend asked me for the 7th time in a row for me to smash raw... She must think I'm made of coat hangers.
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has 46.63 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, relationship, sex, work
Sometimes I wish I was a bird: I would fly over certain people and shit on their heads.
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has 46.59 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Little Johnny's teacher asks him, "If I have 5 cookies, and I give you 2, how many cookies do I have left?" Little Johnny replies, "Zero, you're giving me more than just 3 cookies. I'm taking all 5 baby!" The teacher just facepalms herself. "I can strongly suggest that you work on your math skills Johnny." the teacher suggests. "Oh I know math, one man plus one girl, subtract a condom, equals a baby!" Little Johnny says.
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has 46.37 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, math, teacher
What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? Better hold onto your nuts because this is no ordinary blowjob.
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has 46.03 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Knock Knock. Who's There? Justin. Justin who? Your justin time to wipe my ass!
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has 46.00 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
A woman came to his doctor with a left knee that was shot through. The doctor asked her: "What does it mean? Why did you shoot accurately your left knee?" The woman tells him only: "Sorry, but, you doctor, have told me that the heart is located two thumbs under my left breast."
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has 45.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, doctor, women
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