The best dirty jokes

Q. What do a toilet and a woman have in common? A. Without the hole in the middle they aren't good for shit.
has 45.30 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty, women
What is the same with spreading butter on a toast and getting a woman to spread her legs? It is possible with a credit card, but much easier with a knife.
has 45.26 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman? When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
has 45.24 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex, women
Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!
has 44.86 % from 137 votes. More jokes about: catholic, dirty, priest, teen
Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
has 44.61 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, sex, Yo mama
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you gonna eat that?
has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.
has 44.50 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."
has 44.48 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food
Little Johnny's teacher asks him, "If I have 5 cookies, and I give you 2, how many cookies do I have left?" Little Johnny replies, "Zero, you're giving me more than just 3 cookies. I'm taking all 5 baby!" The teacher just facepalms herself. "I can strongly suggest that you work on your math skills Johnny." the teacher suggests. "Oh I know math, one man plus one girl, subtract a condom, equals a baby!" Little Johnny says.
has 44.48 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, math, teacher
Q: What book do women like the most? A: "Their husbands checkbook!"
has 44.47 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: dirty, husband, women
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