The best dirty jokes

Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
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has 43.52 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, life, men
What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.
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has 43.44 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous? Get back! I have no idea how big it grows!
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has 43.40 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog? A: Gee, we really do taste like chicken!
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has 43.14 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, lesbian
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
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has 42.33 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, sex, women
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly. After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says "If my proof falls then I rome through the halls." Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob. The man is confused and says "what are you doing?" She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some." The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did. Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good. The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping "Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch." Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?" She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
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has 42.33 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: couple, dirty, men, stupid, women
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
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has 42.19 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
Q: What do you call a one-man quickie? A: A yankee.
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has 42.06 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Billy woke up in the middle of the night, thirsty. Instead of going to the kitchen though, he goes to his parents’ bedroom, while they were about to have sex and his father had a condom in his hand. The father, surprised by his son entrance, bent over pretending to look for something. "What are you looking for?" Billy asked. "Aw, well..hmm.. I’m looking for a little mouse!" the father lied. So, Billy spontaneously: "Why..? To “jump” it..?"
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has 42.00 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What do Blondes say after sex? A1: Thanks Guys. A2: Are you boys all in the same band? A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
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has 41.94 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, music, sex
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