Let's not mess with nature. We are here to make babies. So, let's get to it.
A man goes to the doctor about the size if his penis. He says to the doctor "My penis is too small." Doctor gives the man some medicine, says "Drink this everytime you bump into something your penis will grow an inch." So the man thanks the doctor and leaves. He drinks the medicine on his way home he bumps into a lampot so his penis grew an inch. Just a little further down the road he bumps into an Indian guy. A thousand apologies, he penis grows one thousand inches, baffled by his extra long penis he decides to paint it red, hite and blue, and wrapped it round his neck, he decides to go to the cinema, he was watching a dirty movie, sat on the top of the row of seats, all of a sudden this voice comes on the speaker. "Can the man with the red white and blue scarf stop chucking ice cream to the people below?"
Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
What do you call a stoner that just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.
What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous? Get back! I have no idea how big it grows!
Q: What do you call a one-man quickie? A: A yankee.
What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end. A toothbrush with toothpaste
Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you gonna eat that?
Q: Why can women play hockey? A: Because they have to change their pads after every period.