A man was fishing and he caught a crocodile.
The crocodile told him, "Please let me go.
I'll grant you any wish you desire."
The man said, "Okay.
I wish my balls could touch the ground."
So the crocodile bit his legs off.
Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.
What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k?
A joystick does its job.
Yo mama so fat you cant tell if she got a penis or a vagina.
Why do women fart after they take a piss?
Because they can't shake it, so they blow dry it.
Q: What did one tampon say to the other?
A: Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly.
After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says
"If my proof falls then I rome through the halls."
Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob.
The man is confused and says "what are you doing?"
She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some."
The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did.
Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good.
The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping
"Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch."
Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?"
She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
Q: When does a cub become a boy scout?
A: When he eats his first Brownie.
How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.