Q: When does a cub become a boy scout?
A: When he eats his first Brownie. 
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
How does a gay man fake an orgasm?
He spits on his partners back.
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever.
Me: What's that hunny?
Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk.
Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh.
If you put your ear up to it... you can smell the ocean.
Q: What did one tampon say to the other?
A: Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted?
A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.
How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.