Why do women fart after they take a piss?
Because they can't shake it, so they blow dry it.
I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period?
A. Finger painting.
Vote:
How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.
Why did God give women belly buttons?
For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?"
"So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
There once was a girl named Pinkie who desired to have a little inky,
when the notion of the motion was planted,
in her dinky little head.
With her butt in the air,
while the man in the sidecar tattooed her derriere 100 miles per hour down I 45 to bike fest.
Drunk and stupid and would not listen,
smeared beyond recognition,
she said it was Tinker Bell but we couldn't tell O well.
My favorite sexual position is called "The Osama"...
its where I burst into your room and blow a load on your face.
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter?
A: Because their lips will get chapped!
I've some bread dough in my pants.
Wanna see if it rises?