Two men were talking about their wives.
First: "I'm a teacher whenever we are in bed my wife says repeat please."
Second: "I'm a driver when we are sexing she thinks I'm in a gas station so she screws my dick and says: 'fill it up super!'"
Billy woke up in the middle of the night, thirsty.
Instead of going to the kitchen though, he goes to his parents’ bedroom, while they were about to have sex and his father had a condom in his hand.
The father, surprised by his son entrance, bent over pretending to look for something.
"What are you looking for?" Billy asked.
"Aw, well..hmm.. I’m looking for a little mouse!" the father lied.
So, Billy spontaneously: "Why..? To “jump” it..?"
What do you say to a virgin?
Thanks for nothing!
Q: Who did little Johnny see when he snuck into the church late one night?
A: Pastor Bedtime.
Vote:
Yo mama so fat you cant tell if she got a penis or a vagina.
Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep?
A: When the big hand touches the small one.
Vote:
Q: When is the only time you can smack an ugly woman in the face?
A: When her mustache is on fire.
Q: What do you call a blonde doing a handstand?
A: A brunette with bad breath.
Q: How many gays does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None because they screw each other the dirty fucks.
Vote:
You see, masturbation is so unpredictable.
I just go up and down.
Vote: