Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter?
A: Because their lips will get chapped!
A 7-year-old boy and a 40-year old man are walking together in a dark forest.
The young boy says, "I'm afraid..." The 40-year-old man replies," You're afraid?!
I have to walk out of here alone!"
I hope the children will never find out why I say "oops..." so often when I vacuum their rooms.
Vote:
Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit?
Are you gonna eat that?
I've some bread dough in my pants.
Wanna see if it rises?
A black third grader goes to his mom and asks, '"Mom, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is that because I'm black?"
And she responds, "No nigga, it's because you're nineteen!"
How do lesbians handle their liquor?
By the ears.
(Lick her)
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?"
"So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?