What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
Roses are red violets are blue, I have never tried So can I stick it up you?
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother. ‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son. The mother replies, ‘I don’t know. Surprise me.’
A priest took a beautiful girl in his bedroom. He put a Bible on the bed and asked the girl to lie on the bed. When the priest tried to have sex with her, the girl shouted: "Father, what are you doing?" The priest replied "Calm down my child. Holy Bible under you, Holy Father above you and Holy water passing through."
There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick. He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed: Have you been doing anything unusual? And he said: No. So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks. So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked: Have you been doing anything at all unusual? And the guy said: Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
Q: When does a cub become a boy scout? A: When he eats his first Brownie.
What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese
Q: What did the seal say when found nuts in the sea? A: "Look I found deep nuts."
If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?