A black third grader goes to his mom and asks, '"Mom, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is that because I'm black?"
And she responds, "No nigga, it's because you're nineteen!"
Q: Why does a squirrle swim on its back?
A: To keep its nuts dry
Johny is the first day in jail in the cell with one mighty and a crazy prisoner and this crazy prisoner tells Johny: "You probably do not know that on the first day must every new prisoner must pass over the so-called welcome´s ceremonial. Ok, so I ask you directly. Do you want it with cream or without the cream?"
Johny says: "I want it with creme, of course."
The crazy prisoner yells and says: "Cremo, come here, please."
My favorite sexual position is called "The Osama"...
its where I burst into your room and blow a load on your face.
Q: How are rape and an airplane similar?
A: The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
Yo momma's so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said Lil Mary will never amount to anything.
There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick.
He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed:
Have you been doing anything unusual?
And he said: No.
So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks.
So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked:
Have you been doing anything at all unusual?
And the guy said:
Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother.
‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son.
The mother replies, ‘I don’t know.
Surprise me.’
Q: Do you know what 69 is?
A: It's a good thing screwed up by a period.
If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?