The best dirty jokes

Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
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has 37.68 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, winter, women
A 7-year-old boy and a 40-year old man are walking together in a dark forest. The young boy says, "I'm afraid..." The 40-year-old man replies," You're afraid?! I have to walk out of here alone!"
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has 37.65 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty
I hope the children will never find out why I say "oops..." so often when I vacuum their rooms.
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has 37.45 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, kids, masturbation
Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
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has 37.36 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, celebrity, dirty, drug, music
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you gonna eat that?
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has 37.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: dirty
I've some bread dough in my pants. Wanna see if it rises?
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has 37.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A black third grader goes to his mom and asks, '"Mom, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is that because I'm black?" And she responds, "No nigga, it's because you're nineteen!"
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has 37.20 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: dirty
How do lesbians handle their liquor? By the ears. (Lick her)
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has 36.97 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty, lesbian
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?" "So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
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has 36.82 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, love, music, time
If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?
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has 36.75 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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