How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.
Why did God give women belly buttons?
For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
My favorite sexual position is called "The Osama"...
its where I burst into your room and blow a load on your face.
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period?
A. Finger painting.
Vote:
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?"
"So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.
I've some bread dough in my pants.
Wanna see if it rises?
Q: When is the only time you can smack an ugly woman in the face?
A: When her mustache is on fire.
What do you say to a virgin?
Thanks for nothing!
Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!