The best dirty jokes

My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh. If you put your ear up to it... you can smell the ocean.
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has 39.91 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fish
There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick. He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed: Have you been doing anything unusual? And he said: No. So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks. So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked: Have you been doing anything at all unusual? And the guy said: Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
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has 39.74 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, food
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother. ‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son. The mother replies, ‘I don’t know. Surprise me.’
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has 39.74 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
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has 39.73 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: dirty, women
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
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has 39.60 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, dirty, lesbian
Q: How do you circumcise a whale? A: With four skin-divers.
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has 39.56 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: dirty
What's the difference between a dead baby and a table? You can't fuck a table.
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has 39.37 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, dirty, disgusting, sex
How do lesbians handle their liquor? By the ears. (Lick her)
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has 39.12 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: dirty, lesbian
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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has 38.99 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dirty, Fathers day, marriage, sex
Q: What did one tampon say to the other? A: Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches.
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has 38.94 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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