Why did God give women belly buttons? For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
Q: What did the seal say when found nuts in the sea? A: "Look I found deep nuts."
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
Q: What did the hard boiled egg say to the boiling water? A: I can't get a hard-on because I was just layed.
A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad." "Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."
Yo mama so fat when she uses a space shuttle as a vibrator.
I've some bread dough in my pants. Wanna see if it rises?