China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
Vote:
I've some bread dough in my pants.
Wanna see if it rises?
Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly.
After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says
"If my proof falls then I rome through the halls."
Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob.
The man is confused and says "what are you doing?"
She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some."
The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did.
Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good.
The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping
"Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch."
Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?"
She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
What do you call an afghan virgin
Mever bin laid on
Q: How do the makers of Celebrex celebrate?
A: Fuck if I know
Boy: you left this at my house last night
Girl: that aint mine
Boy : sorry number 32 I thought you were someone else
A priest took a beautiful girl in his bedroom.
He put a Bible on the bed and asked the girl to lie on the bed.
When the priest tried to have sex with her, the girl shouted:
"Father, what are you doing?"
The priest replied "Calm down my child.
Holy Bible under you, Holy Father above you and Holy water passing through."
Yo mama so fat when she uses a space shuttle as a vibrator.