The best disgusting jokes

A drunk sitting at a bar observes a very snobby woman participating in a wine tasting contest. She was very good at identifying the wine. At the first taste she says: "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1998" and all the people were amazed. At the 2nd try she answers "Cabernet Sauvignon, 1953" and they were once again amazed. Then the drunk pisses in a glass and hands it to her. She tries it and says "Yak, this tastes like piss!" And the drunk says, "Yeah, but what year was I born?"
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, disgusting, drunk, wine, women
A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders a hamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, "One burger!" Whereupon the chef grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it in his bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and then tosses it on the grill. "That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," the old lady says. "Yeah?" says the counterman. "You should be here in the morning when he makes the doughnuts."
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm? A: "How are we supposed to find an egg in all this sh*t?"
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has 66.46 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, gay
What's gross? Farting in the bathtub. What's grosser than that? Catching the bubbles with your teeth.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church? A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
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has 66.43 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: church, disgusting, gay
How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!
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has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, pirate
There was a horny young lady named Lil, Who fucked dynamite sticks for a thrill. They found her vagina In North Carolina And bits of her tits in Brazil!
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has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What do you call a cow with no legs. A: Ground Beef!
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has 66.21 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Bob walks into a public bathroom and notices a guy with no arms standing next to a urinal. As Bob takes care of his business, he wonders how the poor soul is going to take a leak. Bob finishes and heads for the door, but figures he should ask the man if he needs help. "Oh yes please!?" the man cries. "You have a kind heart, sir," says the man with no arms. But as Bob goes ahead, unzips the man, and pulls his willy out, he encounters all kinds of mold, red bumps, moles, scabs, scars, and other unpleasant-looking things. The armless man asks Bob to kindly point it... then shake it, put it back and zip it. So Bob, gathers his courage, shuts his eyes and does so. "Thank you very much, sir!" says the armless man. "No problem," says Bob "but what the hell is wrong with your penis?" The guy pulls pulls his arms out of his shirt and says "I don't know, but I ain't touching it!"
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has 66.21 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: business, disgusting
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Santa have in common? A: After a night of visiting children, they both have empty sacks.
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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