The best disgusting jokes

Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job? A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, work
I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, ugly
This desperate guy named Jim goes to the whorehouse with 5$. He buys a the cheapest prostitute named Sandpaper Sally. As they start to have sex, Jim screams, "Ouch! Now I know why they call you Sandpaper Sally!" Sally scoots out of the room. Five minutes later she came back and Jim attempts sex once again. "What the hell happened?" asks Jim, "This is the best sex I''ve ever had!" Sally replies, "Oh, I just picked my scabs."
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, money, sex
Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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has 49.13 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, prison
Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs, with a ten inch penis? A: "Partially disabled."
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has 49.12 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Prostitute 1: Tonight's my night I can smell c**k in the air. Prostitute 2: Oh, sorry. I burped.
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What do you call the sweat on your balls after having sex with your cousin? A: Relative humidity.
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has 48.69 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, sex
Q: What's the difference between your wife and your job? A: After 10 years the job still sucks.
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has 48.67 % from 280 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, time, wife, work
"If we don't change the direction we're going, we're likely to end up at the wrong end." "People who go out of their way to help others have great taste." "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, but not hungry." "Don't give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed at another morgue." "A journey of a hundred trillion cells begins with a single nibble." "The only difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot takes longer to chew." "It's all right to have little butterflies in your stomach. In fact, I'd say a trip to the elementary school play is a wonderful idea." "You don't know what your appetite can get away with until you try. Or are tried." "If you carry your childhood with you, you should probably go the bathroom soon." "Never keep up with Joneses. Have them over for dinner." "Let your hook always be cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a very startled swimmer."
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has 48.41 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food, sport, travel
How do you make a woman scream twice in the bedroom? Fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the curtains.
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has 48.41 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, women
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