The best disgusting jokes

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel. "Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver." "I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart." "I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite."
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has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, football
Q: What's the difference between your wife and your job? A: After 10 years the job still sucks.
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has 48.69 % from 276 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, time, wife, work
A man goes to the doctor about the size if his penis. He says to the doctor "My penis is too small." Doctor gives the man some medicine, says "Drink this everytime you bump into something your penis will grow an inch." So the man thanks the doctor and leaves. He drinks the medicine on his way home he bumps into a lampot so his penis grew an inch. Just a little further down the road he bumps into an Indian guy. A thousand apologies, he penis grows one thousand inches, baffled by his extra long penis he decides to paint it red, hite and blue, and wrapped it round his neck, he decides to go to the cinema, he was watching a dirty movie, sat on the top of the row of seats, all of a sudden this voice comes on the speaker. "Can the man with the red white and blue scarf stop chucking ice cream to the people below?"
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has 48.69 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, doctor, medical, sex
Yo mama's lips are so big when you smile you wet your hair.
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has 48.37 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, ugly, Yo mama
How can you tell if a porno was made in the 70's? The guys' schlongs have sideburns!
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, time
Three old men were sitting on a porch. "I wish I could take a healthy piss," said one. "I wish I could take a healthy crap," said another. "I can take a crap at 6 AM and a piss at 11 AM. I just wish I could get up before noon."
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health, time
There once was a girl named Suzy Brown Said no one could lay her down. Over the hill came Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of swinging meat. He took her in the long tall grass, Shoved his dick right up her ass. Then she blew one gnarly fart, Blew his ball two feet apart. Over the hill went Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of shredded meat.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Why are contipated folks unkind and rude? Cause they don't give a crap!
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: Did you hear about the couple that "96ed?" A: After they "69ed" they rolled over and sh*t in each other's hair.
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: couple, disgusting, sex
What did Obi Wan say when Luke was constipated? "Use the F-O-R-C-E Luke!"
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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