The best disgusting jokes

Little Johnny walks into his parent's room one night to find them having sex. "Mom? What are you doing?" he asks his mom. "Making a cake" his mom replies. Later that week, Little Johnny walks asks his mom in the car "Were you and daddy making a cake on the couch" he asks. "Yeah. Why?" his mom asks, confused and worried. "Because I licked the icing off the couch! It was delicious!" he responded.
has 47.05 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, disgusting, little Johnny, sex
Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
has 46.90 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, redneck
Imagine, there are on the bus only 5 persons: A busman, an old woman, two younger women and one man. The old woman comes to the busman and tells him: "Dear busman, would you like to eat a few hazelnuts?" The busman says: "Yes, why not?" He takes the hazelnuts from her hand and eats them. This repeats even two times, but when the old woman offers other hazelnuts to the busman for the fourth time, the busman asks this old woman: "Madame, where do you take all these hazelnuts from? It is a real amount and I am already full." The old woman only says: "You know, dear busman, I have bought the chocolate with hazelnuts, the hazelnuts are very hard for my dental plate, so I have sucked them all out, brought it to you and you have already eaten them all."
has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: age, chocolate, dentist, disgusting, food
A demon died and was asked by god what he wanted to become in his next life. The demon said "I wish to become good in my next life. I want to be as pure and white as an angel and also have angel wings... But I still want to drink blood." So god turned him into a maxi pad.
has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, god, life
What's grosser than gross? Ten babies in one mail box. What's grosser than that? One baby in ten mailboxes. What's grosser than that? Biting into a pickle and finding a vein. What's grosser than that? A cheerleader doing a split and sticking to the floor. What's grosser than that? A girl thinking she has crabs only to find it's fruit flies because her cherry rotted.
has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's the difference between a leprechaun and gonorrhea? One's a cunning runt.
has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup? Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"
has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food
What's red and sits in a corner? A baby playing with a razor blade.
has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: baby, disgusting
An asp in the grass is a snake, but a grasp in the ass is a goose.
has 46.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
Hey, did you hear about the cannibal who arrived late to the dinner party? They gave him the cold shoulder!
has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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